I'm sitting out back with our puppy. Just spent another day hiding who we are. Having to pay the consequences of a world that doesn't let you love who you love. Some days I want to shout to the world- I am in love and she's a woman! My wife!
But that's just a pipe dream. My wife and I live smack down the middle of a religious suburbia where everyone is in everyone else's business. Rumors have flown in the past that we are together. We manage to squash them but the longer people notice how great of friends we are, the more people think it. We knew tht would happen of course. But what else are we to do?
My wife has a few more years before her son graduates high school. And it is not the time to pretty much renounce this whole area and her whole entire family. She would lose everything. Not to mention what that bastard devil of an ex husband might do. Too dangerous.
So to those that say this is a choice. I continue to maintain BULL SHIT. FUCKING BULL SHIT. Our life is hard every day. Sharing a love unmatched even by straight couples standards. Being careful every second of every day. Wearing my wedding ring around my neck and not around my finger. Wanting to kiss my wife softly on the lips without the fear of someone coming upon us.
Every day is hard. Some days aren't as hard. But every day is at least hard. Maybe one day we will be free, either by money or circumstance that will allow us to not care what this world thinks.
Until then. Here we are firmly locked in a closet.
No comments:
Post a Comment